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Thursday, April 7, 2011

N2MEUC : Apathy masking Fear Generated by Unmet Needs

There are two or more kinds of "I am not interested".  One is an authentic lack of attraction. Another one is apathy or denial of need. Type can be distinquished by qualities or atitudes. Authentic lack of attraction is associated with one or more: alertness, balance, competance,vitality, and other qualities of aliveness. The other is associated with one or more: boredom, apathy, irritation, compulsion, obsession, fault finding and blame and other bad feeling signals of unmet need or needs.

In Western society, deeply meaningful or deeply fulfilling encounters are mostly accidental or perhaps considered fated. Many are fueled by hormones in the service of perpetuating DNA. (And a whole lot of encounters which leave a LOT to be desired are fueled by reproductive hormones.)

Due to ignorance and lack of experience, people are limited in their connecting ability. Connecting in a broader range of circumstances and at different levels can be learned. This connection is experienced as meaningful and fulfilling.  Connection can be cultivated and/or expressed intentionally through touch, breath, words, sounds, awareness, gaze and by directing and receiving energy. 

I have the impression that many so called primitive societies had cultures that were vastly superior to ours in supporting rich, vibrant relationships among the people. Everybody's interpersonal needs were more fully met than in our society. The North American Natives have a wonderful saying "All my Relations" inclusive of all two leggeds, animals, and the spirit world and the Creator. Those cultures had more "Soul", more "Presence".

So back to apathy masking fear generated by unmet needs.
Humans need safety, body connection, understanding, to be seen, to be heard, to be accepted. This is known instinctively by some people. There are studies verifying all these things for those who want to know what science says. Experiences that contain the qualities mentioned above have been scientifically demonstrated to help our immune systems as well as to enhance our abilities to handle challenges in life.

The Apathy can be seen as our old hurts trying to protect us from reexperiencing old pain. Our fears of being hurt or being left with bad feelings urge us to not take risks. Our desire for more richness in relating urges us to look for or create opportunities.  We can learn how to create richness of connection and learn how to reestablish broken connection.

Cindy MoonRose, Martin Holsinger, and Anna Moore through Enlightening Adventures in Meditative Intimacy are offering learning experiences. Go to this website to sign up for annoucements of events

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